House listing withdrawn as forest animals wreak havoc

A central Hamburg real estate listing has been withdrawn after forest animals were discovered gnawing away at the newly built house.  A black bear and two raccoons were found ploughing their snouts into the exterior trim as owners Wolfgang and Hildegudrun Schmeddlapp returned today from a woodcutting expedition.

“We couldn’t believe it,” wailed Herr Schmeddlapp.  ”By the time we got home, they’d already eaten the door, window shutters, half of one side of the roof, and nearly an entire wall!”

The Smeddlapps, a Swabian back-to-the-land farming couple from Stuttgart, say they’d put their life savings into the house.  ”Work-work-build-a-house.  That’s what they always told us to do in life.  It’s all gone now,” moaned Frau Schmedlapp. “Just look at the place.  We might as well have invested in Greek bonds for all it’s come to.”

Wildlife experts say it’s highly unusual for black bears to come out of hibernation to feed.

“They usually store up a lot for the winter,” said Bea Lotto of the Hamburg Tierschutzvereinunddingsbums.  ”What we want to find out is why a house made with ginger and molasses, glued together with a mixture of egg white and icing sugar and decorated with Smarties, Gummy bears and those awful round things you get from Aldi around Christmas would attract bear and raccoon.  It’s a mystery.”

A banding found on one of the raccoons may give a clue to its origins and behaviour.

“If you look closely at the leg of that fellow up there on the left, he’s wearing an ID bracelet,” said Lotto.  ”It’s highly unusual for a Waschbaer – err, sorry, raccoon – to be tagged.  It might be a clue he’s from Munich.  We’ll have to do a scat sample to check for Weisswurscht just to be sure, though.”

Busking at the Christmas markets

The red-haired girl and a friend went out busking today, he with his saxophone and she with her clarinet.

Although they’re schoolmates and so see each other every day, they’d not had much time to practise their Christmas songs.  He lives far away south across the Elbe river, and they’re both busy kids.

But they did have time for a couple of sessions before hitting the Christmas markets.

She went out last year with another friend who also plays the clarinet, and that time I watched them both very closely the whole time.  But this year we left the two of them to practise at our place, catching up with them after we’d come back from having lunch down in the harbour.

They’d been playing for about a half-hour by the time we’d stopped by to watch and say hello.  First thing she told us was how a woman had just come up to them and told them to stop because they sounded awful!

I thought that was pretty mean, but the red-haird girl was smiling broadly.  She didn’t care.  They were out there in the crowds playing away, and coins were dropping into her clarinet case.  I added a couple.

“We’re heading downtown if the weather stays nice,” she chirped.

I hadn’t counted on them venturing so far away, and felt a free-range kids moment coming on.

“Uh… really?” I said.  ”All the way downtown?”

“Sure!”

“OK, but watch out for yourselves,” I said.  ”Not everyone down there is going to be friendly.”

“It’s OK,” her friend said. “I’m pretty athletic.  If anyone tries anything, I’ll run after them.”

As wife K and I left them to play some more, I told her of my anxiety, just letting them go all the way downtown midst the crowded madness of Saturday pre-Christmas shopping.

“Just remind me a couple of times that everything’s going to be OK,” I said.

Then I added that I didn’t want to be lurking around the corner all the time, they’re close to 15 and mature for their ages and could take care of themselves, I didn’t want to be like some sort of helicopter parent because that’s not the way I am.  But it felt very strange to just start walking away and let them go.

“They’ll be OK,” K said.  ”And don’t forget. We’ve got to give them roots, but also let them have wings.”

The fallen tree of light

We’re not a religious family, but we do like to slip into churches wherever we go to get away from the crowd and spend some time in quiet reflection.

We’ve been doing that for years at Hamburg’s St. Petri, a massive church in the centre of the old city’s shopping district.

Last night we left behind the throngs crammed into the nearby City Hall Christmas market to light a couple of candles at a simple yet stunning display.

The bare trunk of a small tree lies on its side supported only by its truncated branches.  Set up about a month ago, it is groaning under the weight of the wax of thousands of candles now at least two feet thick.

On the wall at left it says:

This tree lies as if fallen over.  Only its branches support it.  It seems bare and injured.  On its cuts the wood is red like a wound.

But it’s a tree of light, almost like a Christmas tree in all its glory.  The candles lend beauty to it.

The candles on this tree are signs of memory, hope and lament.

What injuries and wounds in your life or in our society do you think of when you look at the tree?

Light a candle for them and place it on the trunk.  The candles are a prayer for them.

First slide of winter, 2009

I love taking advantage of little bits of time, especially during this hectic pre-Christmas whirl.

Saturday morning in the fresh snow and cold the little red-haired girl and I headed with the wooden sled to the Elbe riverbank near where we used to live when we first came to Hamburg.

We were only out there for an hour or so, but every time we do a childhood tradition like this I savour it, thinking: this might be the last.  She’s growing up so fast, how much longer will she feel like going out with her old man for a bit of fun in the snow?

Translation of the end:

How you supposed to steer?

You gotta lean!

But I did!

Oh…

Ah…

A peek inside a Christmas card

The other day the little red-haired girl wrote a Christmas card to her Grandma in Canada.

Here’s what she put inside:

Dear Grandma:

Merry Christmas!

I hope you will have a nice Christmas.

The horse I am taking care of is called Nuncius.

I’m riding in a tournament this weekend.

He’s really fast.

School’s fine and we’ve already taken most of the tests. I’m really looking forward to the Christmas holidays.

Oma is coming next weekend and we will have a Canadian Christmas this year. ***

Last Friday me and my class went to a play. It was called “Momo.”

It was a bit boring and someone stuck a chewing gum on my seat and it stuck to my clothes. That was pretty disgusting!

I hope you will have a nice time with Gordon.

love,

…

PS: It really snowed a few weeks ago!

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***Because I have to work on Christmas Eve, we’ll do it the Canadian way this year and open presents Christmas morning.

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Anyone recognise the Rupert Bear Christmas cards? Picked them up at a lovely little shop in Hamburg’s Ottensen neighbourhood half-way out the door after buying a bunch of Christmas crackers. I’d already resisted the bottles of scotch, the jars of Seville Orange marmelade, the packages of Pure Butter cookies, but I couldn’t leave without Rupert. I used to get a Daily Express Annual every year for Christmas.

If you’re anywhere near the Altona train station, you can find this gem of a store less than 10 minutes walk away at Eulenstrasse 49. They also take orders online for postal delivery at sweetsuburbia.de